“Give our organization some good news, please! Help us cope with the fears and anxiety we all feel surrounding the virus outbreak.” Beneath her thin veneer of cheeriness, my host’s anxiety was palpable. It had been a very difficult week for all of us. Like everyone else, I too was exhausted, physically and emotionally. It was my seventh webinar since Monday, and in a few short minutes we would begin another.
There was still much hope to share and I was deeply grateful for the opportunity to encourage others. It also had the effect of reminding me too that we would all get through this-together. We would begin by discussing a number of coping techniques, but I wanted to save the best idea for last–an infinitely encouraging phenomenon first discussed in the mid-1990’s by psychologists Richard Tedeschi, PhD, and Lawrence Calhoun, PhD but still unknown to many. More times than I could remember, it had helped me think differently about the grief and trauma I had experienced in my own life. And, these past two weeks, it had helped me to keep my own emotions in check while I spoke to organizations to encourage, overwhelmed, anxious virtual workers. I knew it would help them too.
What did I share? It was this hope and assurance: Nearly all of could soon look forward to an eventual, deeply satisfying recognition that, after passing through this traumatic period, we had experienced undeniable “post-traumatic growth.” I would tell my audience that we wouldn’t even have to wait for the current traumatic season to end. In fact, if we looked for it carefully, we could see the beginnings of this change already, in others, even in ourselves.
Post traumatic growth is defined as the experience we have that our development, at least in some areas, has surpassed what was present before the crisis occurred. Put even more succinctly: “It is the positive mental shift experienced as a result of adversity.” Tedeschi found that as many as 90% of survivors of various types of traumatic events reported at least one Post-Traumatic Growth benefit. In this current pandemic crisis, we too can expect this positive experience.
People who experience post-traumatic growth speak about positive psychological changes, character development, and new perspectives in response to the adversity they have endured. Although this pandemic is far from over, like the first flowers which defiantly spring up this time of year, and may even suffer a late snow, we can already acknowledge a positive shift, here and there, within ourselves and others, despite the dark news we hear daily and the anxieties and fears that can overtake us at times.
While we can never minimize the suffering millions around the globe are and will continue to experience due to COVID-19 and its health and economic impact, what we have already been hearing, and will be hearing much more about in the days to come, are examples of post-traumatic growth.
As I have interacted with organizational teams and friends virtually over the past few days, I have heard many individuals talking about early examples of post-traumatic growth in their own lives, even as the current crisis rolls on.
On a personal level, they have described:
· A greater appreciation of their spouse, friends, colleagues and family
· A heightened delight in the simple pleasures of life- walking in nature as spring begins, a good cup of coffee
· More time for prayer, mediation and reading
· A return to adequate rest
· Time to slow down and prepare healthy meals
· More time for the children, family and catching up with friends
· A return to neglected hobbies and a desire to start new ones
· Seeing in themselves a strength they didn’t know they had
· Reconnecting with extended family members
· A deep interest in helping others in new, creative ways
On the work front, they have cited:
· Satisfaction in seeing, after these early chaotic days, they are beginning to navigate remote work better than they expected
· Extra hours in the day now that there is no need to commute
· Joy over learning new technologies, platforms and creative ways to connect
· A closer sense of camaraderie as a work team and as an organization
· Gratitude that managers and leaders care about their challenges juggling childcare and setting up workspaces and have given them much latitude in doing so.
· An explosion of creativity in connecting, for example, one organization just had their first “virtual happy hour”
My prediction: Very soon the non-stop dark news stories about the pandemic, will need to share space with new podcasts, webinars, comedians, and programming highlighting encouraging stories of hope, growth and resiliency. (Will social media and online shopping sites in 9 months not be flooded with newborn babies wearing “Corona Baby” t-shirts?) In a few weeks, everyone will be able to identify their favorite, emerging leaders whose shows, videos, art, writing or volunteer efforts bring hope to others. These stories are everywhere, they are not just widely being shared yet, and our world needs to hear them. What’s your story of hope and resiliency? Share it!
Post-traumatic growth does not negate that a crisis moment or season has been traumatic. It does affirm that we will all be able to identify ways in which we have become better parents, friends, family, community, and team members.
To a significant degree, even in times of trauma, our emotions follow what we focus upon. Each of us will need to strike a personal balance in how much news we consume around the pandemic and what positive experiences we pursue, recognize, record and share with others.
Want to get a jump on your own post-traumatic growth? One proven strategy is to keep a “Gratitude List.” It is easy to dismiss this idea as “touchy/feely” but the research backs it up: Those who will daily record what they are grateful for and what they are learn about themselves during this time of uncertainty, will generally fare much better in terms of their levels of anxiety, depression and stress.
Be gentle with yourself, loved ones and work teams as you navigate this crisis. Put together your own “team” of friends, colleagues and family members you can go to for personal support. Reach out for whatever help you need to deal with your fears, anxieties and needs. Then, as you work through your emotions, don’t neglect to look for post-traumatic growth and stories of kindness, hope and resiliency. You will find them everywhere.